Gillian Gans Humanities Coach Clark Perpetrator 4/6/15
As my old next door neighbor Makenna and I sit in my little pink and brown 5th grade bedroom covered head to toe with Justin Bieber, One Direction and Taylor Swift posters , I hear my “annoying” little brother Justin outside the door. He comes in with nerf guns in both hands wanting to play or from my eyes annoy me. As the older sister I always picked on him and being 3 years older I definitely thought I was much cooler than a second grader. I yelled “ Ugh Justin get out of room!” And that just making him more excited he started to shoot Makenna and I with his nerf guns. As I continued to yell at him to stop I started to feel embarrassed of my little annoying brother as Makenna ducked down to dodge his bullets . It escalated quicker than I could blink and before I knew it I had already pushed him into my dresser. As I looked up and saw the tears well up in his eyes, the big bump on his head and Makenna face, I sprinted down stairs leaving my friend in complete shock. I couldn’t find my parents right away and so I ran down the street to my close neighbor who was a doctor. I rang the doorbell crying nervous I had ruined his life because he already has had so many health issues and head injuries. She opened the door and I could barely get words out. I cried and asked her to please help my little brother. She ran back to my house with me and by the time we got there my parents, Makenna’s parents and the family across the street were already there. I was so mortified I just sat on my front door step crying and praying everything could just be okay. As I peaked inside the door I could see the doctor from down the street shining a flashlight in his eyes. I could see how scared my parents were and my mom was crying. The doctor told my parents that his eyes were dilated and he had another concussion, and that he can't play sports anymore because that was his third concussion. I remember listening to them tell him not to go to sleep and he was starting to sweat a lot. None of the parents including mine knew what had happened yet they were just concerned on if he was okay. But I was still crying waiting for the question.. “ what happened”. I thought back on the last concussion he had and remember him taking off his shirt in the iceoplex ice skating rink because he was sweating so much and the non stop throwing up on the way to the hospital and into his cat scan. I’m sure my parents already knew it was me from Makenna or maybe just the look on my face. I’ve never felt so awful, scared, uncomfortable and disgusted in myself. I felt like I had a rock on my chest and in my stomach that I just wanted to throw up. I thought my brother would never love me again or at least ever in the same way because I was the worst and cruelest sister. I didn’t even want him to forgive me because I felt like there was no way I could ever be sorry enough to be forgiven. And I kept thinking in my head that he could’ve died because I remember them telling him to stay awake and that if he falls asleep that he might not wake up. And he has a scar on his forehead that is a constant reminder of that day. And to this day it’s still extremely hard for me and my parents to talk about it because almost five years later I still feel bad. Justin was never mad, he forgave me right away and I couldn’t be more blessed to have his as my brother forever. And I learned a lot about forgiveness and patience from him. And now he is only in sixth grade and already almost three inches taller than me. He jokes around about how I beat him up when he was little and there's no messing with him now, but it’s always something to me that will never be funny and remind me of how awesome of a brother I have to ever be so kind and forgiving.